The Pope and his Aids
are in the pharmacy.
They walk past the rows
of shelves laden with sweets
to soothe the throat,
The tablets to settle
the stomach.
The vast richness of
hayfever remedies.
And pause.
Pause.
Pause.
Condoms.
"This will not
do", says the Pope
to his Aids,
gathered around him;
a host of bobbing apples
floating in a barrel of
false enlightenment.
"This is an abomination!
A blasphemy to the Holy Trinity!
Remove them from this store or I,
Will
Leave."
The Aids rush around him gathering
every flavoured, ribbed, extra large offence,
and dumping them in a pile next to the holiday lotions,
Three for two on suncream that would protect from Hell's fire.
The excommunicated prophylactics sit in a pile,
Waiting for their judgement of fire and brimstone,
As the Pope turns to his Aids,
and says,
"Sometimes, in this world of sin,
we need to stick to the rules,
That I make,
For everyone's safety.
How can the world
NOT see this?
Sometimes I think it's just
you lot and me."
Because, as we all know,
The Pope loves his Aids.
Saturday, 20 August 2011
Friday, 19 August 2011
Bible Studies
My group is friendly,
Made up of many nations.
The Italians, Spanish, French,
Portuguese, Polish, Romanian,
Ukranian, Hungarian, Dutch,
And English.
But their group laughs.
Each group of people have brave translators,
To cement the feelings of goodwill,
And pass on the news of Jesus Christ,
Their words flowing around the room like
A whisper of breath,
blown from a pair of lungs with great importance,
Gathering volume as the imformation creats a backlog of understanding.
But their group laughs.
The Brother begins the discussion,
And the discussion is deep,
And the discussion is dull.
Heads begin to turn towards the back of the room.
The other group laughs.
The Brother is under pressure now,
his flock headed towards the greener grass.
He must keep their attention,
And bring them back to the fold.
Juggle,
Or something...
But the other group laughs,
And still he trusts in the faith of the word.
And the crowd goes wild!
In the other room.
And yet while the Brother has lost the battle,
I was lost before it began.
Made up of many nations.
The Italians, Spanish, French,
Portuguese, Polish, Romanian,
Ukranian, Hungarian, Dutch,
And English.
But their group laughs.
Each group of people have brave translators,
To cement the feelings of goodwill,
And pass on the news of Jesus Christ,
Their words flowing around the room like
A whisper of breath,
blown from a pair of lungs with great importance,
Gathering volume as the imformation creats a backlog of understanding.
But their group laughs.
The Brother begins the discussion,
And the discussion is deep,
And the discussion is dull.
Heads begin to turn towards the back of the room.
The other group laughs.
The Brother is under pressure now,
his flock headed towards the greener grass.
He must keep their attention,
And bring them back to the fold.
Juggle,
Or something...
But the other group laughs,
And still he trusts in the faith of the word.
And the crowd goes wild!
In the other room.
And yet while the Brother has lost the battle,
I was lost before it began.
Religion Camp Pt 2
The disillusioned atheist,
Bags stowed away safely,
Joins the rest of the Religious People,
On the pilgrimage to Religion Camp.
The bus is only half full,
Yet the smell of Religion is...
Miraculous.
The smell of Our Lord, Jesus Christ.
The two hip vicars,
Both young,
Shepherd their flock into their seats,
Legally reminding them of the seatbelts they must wear.
Would Jesus not save them if we were to crash?
The organiser, sat at the back,
Is subjected to the torture of the mad youth,
Yelling their devotion to the Lord,
By stopping up 'til one and discussing Capital Punishment.
And lo!
The ferry looms nigh.
The Religious People pile off,
Eager to praise God over an overpriced cup of coffee.
The angry Godlings rush to the deck,
Smoke inhaling and exhaling through their prayer-holes,
Continuing their earlier discussion,
About staying up 'til one and hanging paedos.
The atheist, the organiser and the father (non-clerical),
Our third character,
Gently perambulate towards the bar,
Like the beginning of some xenophobic joke.
And talk turns to the mad youth,
The hip vicars,
The odd couple driving the bus,
Making deals on who is going to swap seats.
The atheist, having sat next to a tasty girl on the way,
Is not inclined to give his seat up,
And the father has come back from camping, and needs his rest.
So the organiser draws the hypothetical short straw.
Fitting.
In what seems like mere seconds,
The announcement comes,
via the new improved crackly tannoy,
to return to the coach.
And now begins the slog.
The long, arduous part of the journey.
The part where hours seem like minutes,
And minutes seem like hours,
Like some retarded board game involving a timer.
Pick whichever one you don't like.
The part where you aren't sure whether
You're awake,
Or Asleep.
The part where eyelids
Droop,
And heads roll,
Onto uncomfortable
Neighbours
Shoulders...
Zzzzzzzzzz.
Bags stowed away safely,
Joins the rest of the Religious People,
On the pilgrimage to Religion Camp.
The bus is only half full,
Yet the smell of Religion is...
Miraculous.
The smell of Our Lord, Jesus Christ.
The two hip vicars,
Both young,
Shepherd their flock into their seats,
Legally reminding them of the seatbelts they must wear.
Would Jesus not save them if we were to crash?
The organiser, sat at the back,
Is subjected to the torture of the mad youth,
Yelling their devotion to the Lord,
By stopping up 'til one and discussing Capital Punishment.
And lo!
The ferry looms nigh.
The Religious People pile off,
Eager to praise God over an overpriced cup of coffee.
The angry Godlings rush to the deck,
Smoke inhaling and exhaling through their prayer-holes,
Continuing their earlier discussion,
About staying up 'til one and hanging paedos.
The atheist, the organiser and the father (non-clerical),
Our third character,
Gently perambulate towards the bar,
Like the beginning of some xenophobic joke.
And talk turns to the mad youth,
The hip vicars,
The odd couple driving the bus,
Making deals on who is going to swap seats.
The atheist, having sat next to a tasty girl on the way,
Is not inclined to give his seat up,
And the father has come back from camping, and needs his rest.
So the organiser draws the hypothetical short straw.
Fitting.
In what seems like mere seconds,
The announcement comes,
via the new improved crackly tannoy,
to return to the coach.
And now begins the slog.
The long, arduous part of the journey.
The part where hours seem like minutes,
And minutes seem like hours,
Like some retarded board game involving a timer.
Pick whichever one you don't like.
The part where you aren't sure whether
You're awake,
Or Asleep.
The part where eyelids
Droop,
And heads roll,
Onto uncomfortable
Neighbours
Shoulders...
Zzzzzzzzzz.
Water
I eye the water bottle nervously,
Grasped between hands of vengeance,
Mischievous hands.
Please dont!
I dont want to get changed.
SQUIRT.
I'm going to need five minutes guys.
Grasped between hands of vengeance,
Mischievous hands.
Please dont!
I dont want to get changed.
SQUIRT.
I'm going to need five minutes guys.
A Note From The Poet
That title would make a good poem I think...
Anyway, this post is basically to explain the last poem I wrote (Religion Camp Pt 1) and the poems I will be posting in the near future, all of which were written at Taize, in the South of France (near Lyon). They all reflect the many experiences I had, almost all of which were positive. Characters, names and locations may have been changed to protect the innocent/make better poetry, and I hope anyone who reads it will enjoy.
BB.
Anyway, this post is basically to explain the last poem I wrote (Religion Camp Pt 1) and the poems I will be posting in the near future, all of which were written at Taize, in the South of France (near Lyon). They all reflect the many experiences I had, almost all of which were positive. Characters, names and locations may have been changed to protect the innocent/make better poetry, and I hope anyone who reads it will enjoy.
BB.
Saturday, 6 August 2011
Religion Camp Pt 1
Day one.
The stout atheist,
Comfortable with his Darwin support,
Receives the invitation from his friend;
"Come to religion camp!
It's not that religious at all.
We just play games,
And the girls are really easy."
The atheist,
Curiosity spiked,
Turns to his online banking... ah science,
And confirms the lack of excuse to say no.
He replies, "I suppose so",
His reluctance to accept religion showing,
And sets the date with his friend,
The organiser.
Day twelve.
The organiser calls,
To say that he made a mistake:
"It's slightly more expensive than that!"
The atheist turns,
Again,
To his trusty bank account.
And in what can only be described as a non-religion centred coincidence relating to chance, luck and the random make-up of the universe according to chaos theory, the atheist has enough money.
Day thirteen.
Religion camp is still going ahead, says the atheist.
When are we going?
At the start of summer my friend, replies the organiser.
Day twenty seven.
It's all booked and paid for,
The atheist is getting excited,
Imagining all the girls of the five thousand, looking for salvation.
Day thirty.
The atheist stays at the organiser's house,
Bags packed,
Excitement barely concealed.
"There's just one thing I forgot to say"
Mentions the organiser.
"A few things you need to do while you're there";
RELIGION.
The stout atheist,
Comfortable with his Darwin support,
Receives the invitation from his friend;
"Come to religion camp!
It's not that religious at all.
We just play games,
And the girls are really easy."
The atheist,
Curiosity spiked,
Turns to his online banking... ah science,
And confirms the lack of excuse to say no.
He replies, "I suppose so",
His reluctance to accept religion showing,
And sets the date with his friend,
The organiser.
Day twelve.
The organiser calls,
To say that he made a mistake:
"It's slightly more expensive than that!"
The atheist turns,
Again,
To his trusty bank account.
And in what can only be described as a non-religion centred coincidence relating to chance, luck and the random make-up of the universe according to chaos theory, the atheist has enough money.
Day thirteen.
Religion camp is still going ahead, says the atheist.
When are we going?
At the start of summer my friend, replies the organiser.
Day twenty seven.
It's all booked and paid for,
The atheist is getting excited,
Imagining all the girls of the five thousand, looking for salvation.
Day thirty.
The atheist stays at the organiser's house,
Bags packed,
Excitement barely concealed.
"There's just one thing I forgot to say"
Mentions the organiser.
"A few things you need to do while you're there";
RELIGION.
Friday, 5 August 2011
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